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the "I only wear black" squad
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Literally none asked for the sequel of this lolokay, I lied, few ppl mentioned smth in the tags that they’d like Jasper to wear that dress
st4ndt4ll: my mom just walked in my kitchen wearing her halloween costume and i literally spit up all my food and almost died.
valaartogeiadoun: daisydino: shinys-mind-palace: I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS PICTURE FOR SO LONG My mom just told me I was going to Hell for laughing at this THEY SEE ME ROLLIN’, THEY PRAYIN’
inbulletsandrevenge: I literally jumped in front of the tv when I saw them in american idol and scared my mom. sorry mom.
tomfordvelvetorchid: I hate that as im getting older my nightmares become more realistic lmao. Like as s kid my nightmares were literally getting trapped in a house with my mom there was a giant dinosaur. Now my nightmares are like getting kidnapped,
imreallycoolandfriendly: I remember when I said “men tend to look down on women” men were literally like “so I don’t love my mom? I don’t love my grandma? I don’t love my girlfriend?” like are y’all that literal and stupid
MY MOM MADE PANCAKES FOR DINNER
hardisonparker replied to your post “my mom said they might let you get a field goal this just in my mom is mean i get my meanness from her im so sorry” she’s literally a stream of sarcastic commentary rn i think she’s offended im not
isobelstevenz: a few of my favourite things ☆ (43/50) female characters: tami taylor the most important thing to me is that my daughter be able to talk to me. a girl is entitled to that with her mother. my mother used to tell me that i was going to
icoulduseinsouciantmaybe: #i literally crack up everytime #at least ten of the notes are from me
i’d meet you where the spirit meets the bones
zackisontumblr: my mom will literally download any app
My mom couldn’t figure out how to show her friend my video so she literally just shared my whole Facebook page to her wall
passiveimagination: My mom teaches Kindergarten and I went to her classroom a few days ago and saw what appeared to be a small shrine dedicated to Jodie Foster in the corner of the room and I had literally no idea why it was there, so I asked my mom
studygoddesses: I am literally in love with the fact I get to see how my little cousins interact even with a language barrier. On my mom’s side, I have a 3 year old little cousin who only speaks French, and on my dad’s side I have a 2 year old cousin
istolefrommarcjacobs: THE GUN I’M SCREAMING LITERALLY MY MOM
zofrph: ellirph: gendersurrender: gendersurrender: “You don’t have to say thank you, it’s their job.” YOU ARE LITERALLY THE WORST PERSON Why would you teach your child to be rude and ungrateful. Literally why. Fun fact: My mom taught me
codeinecoveredlips: boootyfriedrice: pumpkinmcqueen: localstarboy:Lil Duval had his mom and grandma in the self driving tesla. This was their reaction 😂 His mom is literally my grandma 😂 dead was not letting up on repeating herself 😂😂😂
trapcard: iwannastayupallnight1d: trapcard: like i can’t believe i have to say this but if you aren’t black it’s literally impossible for you to have a negro nose. That’s not true at all? My mom is white and her nose is literally like jay-z’s,
pumpkinmcqueen: localstarboy: Lil Duval had his mom and grandma in the self driving tesla. This was their reaction 😂 His mom is literally my grandma 😂
busty-imaginations: I was out shopping with my mom for our family gathering. Me and my mom have never been sexual with each other as in fucking and or literal sex. No blowjobs, tittyfucks, ass fucking or even touching. But she sometimes lets me in the
This dog is literally my moms baby. She get pampered soooo well. She is the reason my mom doesn’t suffer empty eat syndrome 💙 #dog #pamperedpooch #awww #momanddog #bestfriend
So me and my mom just smoked pot together for the first timeAnd we had a heart to heart. And we’re literally the same person emotionally.My mom is the independent woman inside me. I’ve never felt more empowered in my lifeLove ya Ma
As much as I don’t like talking to my mom sometimes, I can’t stand people who make her feel like shit. My mom literally got on the next Greyhound bus to be driven across the fucking country to be with her friend when her dad died and now
My mom and dad’s house is literally about to explode.They have a gas leak, and the fire department discovered that it all collected in the attic. They’re trying to figure out how to get it all out. My family got out but they could only find one of
reybencentral: secretidentity24-7: honestly-andrew: honestly-andrew: I took my parents to see Love, Simon My mom: ok so I don’t know who’s gay and who’s not gay. Me: that’s literally the point. Mom: well now that’s just confusing for Simon.
2bimbomexsis: Memory of the day I told my church-going mom and my wormbook sister they would be the first in my new incest harem… literally. The next weekend my mom’s sister comes to visit us with her teenage twin daughters… Thank you “Hypno-Oedipus
amazingandonfire: once I asked my English teacher if teachers shipped their students and after explaining what shipping meant she told me that that is literally one of the most popular discussions in the staff room
kyoto-princess: monobeartheater: marshona: mayorleilalovesyou: iWAS LOOKING EVERYWHERE FOR THIS POST FIRST EVER ACNL POST I REMEMBER this was literally posted on the launch day of new leaf look how far its come My mom literally said this when
melaninhoe: 2opinionatedblackgirls:blahhmebby: happyhalloweenbitch: #girlbyebitch I know people that literally are him this is me I literally watched this everyday in the summer. My mom is obsessed with this vine
we-found-our-own-reasons-to-sing: Like a week before I came out I was talking to my mom and sister about sexuality, and my mom’s exact words were, “being bisexual is gross, you’re gonna have sex with both boys and girls?” and it is literally
fuckmestupid:intoxifaded: llamastemerosos: fuckmestupid: intoxifaded: I recorded the face that my mom makes when I do literally anything lol LMAO YOURE OBVIOUSLY A TEENAGER AND YOURE LITERALLY 86% NAKED DOING A FAKE BELLY DANCE!! I CAN SEE YOUR
Raise your hand if your OTP has literally made you cry, like real tears, not like you just said it on Tumblr but actually cried tears of real unexplainable to your family tears.
cokeproblem: *gets insulted* Nah I don’t care, my mom has said worse to me
justgirlythings: Hey guys! So my mom just moved to Nevada and I’m literally broke and have no money to pay for college. I added a donation button to the side of the page on here and I was really hoping you guys could help me out a bit. Literally
Literally everyone tells me they like my hair always when it’s been any bright color (red, orange, split red + black, or yellow now) anywhere I go that’s a public place, yet my mom still insists on calling it ugly and me ugly. I don’t
sailorbrazil: wish i could crush this and snort it
secretidentity24-7: honestly-andrew: honestly-andrew: I took my parents to see Love, Simon My mom: ok so I don’t know who’s gay and who’s not gay. Me: that’s literally the point. Mom: well now that’s just confusing for Simon. Me: it’s
my mom will literally download any app
whosaprettypolyglot: I told one of my students that his oral presentation was on the 3rd of december He seems to have slightly misunderstood me - I just received an email titled “here is the assignment about the 3rd of december” He’s literally written
I just made a quesedilla and while I was talking to my mom Effie climbed up next to me on the couch and was literally taking bites out of it while I’m still holding it after she just ate her own breakfast & that’s what it’s like being a mom
purrityring: dopenmind: Reblogging this once more because my mom and I legitimately laughed to tears. this is my favorite video on the internet
undead, undead, undead.
So my mom was trying to motivate me to do something so she was giving me a little speech and she literally said the line “You need to grab Tavros by the horns.” omfg
MY MOM AND I WERE WATCHING TV TOGETHER AND ALL OF A SUDDEN SHE YELLS “UPDATE” AND I LITERALLY JUMP TO LOOK AT MY LAPTOP’S SCREEN AND THEN SHE STARTS LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY AT ME WHEN I DID THAT AND SHE THOUGHT SHE COULD GET AWAY FROM
my mom loves watching that show Revenge on abc, idk if you’ve guys every watched it but everyone on that show literally WHISPERS 98% of the time and its really annoying lmfao dsghahs
im literally asking my mom if i should do that project or not
i literally have like no furniture space left to put anything on, i end up having to put things on the floor cause im just ????
my mom gave me like tylenol (like not even a lot) and idk why but suddenly i am HIGH AS FUCK so talk to me because my brain is turning to mush and my body is probably literally on fire
middle aged mom on facebook
muji-milk: when u show ur parents an Amusing Thing on ur phone and they like “who is that? who wrote that? did ur friend take that pic? whos pet is that? where is that?” like i dont KNow fam its just floating around cyberspace and i caught it in
Literally just flipped out on my mom for no reason and now I can’t stop crying… God I hate the comedown from Molly
210pm: *gets insulted* Nah I don’t care, my mom has said worse to me
naked-yogi:babes.
